If you’re a part of a spiritual community, including the entrepreneurial spiritual community, it’s not uncommon to hear things like:
• Sending love and light.
• I only focus on love, I don’t want to put any energy on anything negative.
• Don’t call anything a failure, you should rephrase that into something more positive.
• You don’t have to do things that scare you to transform, rephrase that into doing things that excites you.
• There’s so much negativity in the world, let’s just talk about the positive.
You get the picture.
This happens so frequently, it actually has a name. It’s called a spiritual bypass.
You’re spiritual! That means you shouldn’t be feeling any “bad” emotions. You only feel love and light and only focus on the positive.
So, let’s talk about this. It sounds good, doesn’t it? Who wouldn’t want to focus just on the good and not on the negative? And, if you’ve studied Law of Attraction, you learn that whatever you focus on expands so of course you want to focus on the good versus the negative.
But, as usual, things are rarely what they seem.
Believe it or not, your fear-based emotions, like grief, anger, fear, exist to help you. Fear is there to because there are times in your life that fear is an appropriate emotion — you seeing a shadow at the end of a dark alley — yes, your fear showing up and telling you to get out of there is a good thing. Anger is a reaction when your boundaries have been violated. Guilt helps us live in a community. And grief lets us know we loved. It’s our badge for loving deeply. And if you allow yourself to go there and fully feel grief and let it move through you, the gifts you’ll receive can change your life.
But, those emotions uncomfortable, so in many cases we don’t want to feel them. Instead we do all sorts of things to keep ourselves from feeling them — we drink, overeat, gossip, fight, shop, post inappropriate things on social media, distract ourselves by being “too busy,” etc.
The problem is, ignoring our emotions or burying them or running away from them doesn’t mean they go away. Nope. Feelings just want to be felt. They stick around and bother you until you feel them. Once you do, then (and only then) will they go away.
And, when you don’t feel them, they build up. Which is why we’ve lost a lot of the benefit those feelings can give us — they’re so built up and so desperately want to be felt they start coming out at inappropriate ways. So, we can’t trust them or trust what they’re trying to tell us.
The good news is all is not lost. We can get back to the place where we can use our fear-based emotions to guide us — all we have to do is start pausing and allowing them to be felt and move through us, no matter how crazy they seem in the moment. And eventually we’ll be able to start trusting them again.
Watch below for more on what you can do to start trusting your emotions.
(And if you’re wondering exactly how you can get everything you want simply by flipping your perspective? Check out the first episode here.)