Before coffee. (And trust me, I REALLY like my coffee.) Sometimes even before letting my dogs outside.
It was bad.
Now, at the time, I did have friends who encouraged me to stop that practice. Successful people don’t start their day in their inbox, and as I constantly was saying I wanted to be more successful than I was, perhaps it would make sense for me to adopt some of the same habits successful people do. Right?
And, on one hand, I agreed with my friends who were challenging me. If someone is more successful than you and you want to become more successful, why wouldn’t you do the same things they do?
Except … I couldn’t.
If I didn’t read my email first thing in the morning, I was consumed with anxiety. I couldn’t think about anything else other than what MIGHT be waiting for me in my inbox.
In fact, if I was being completely honest, I was controlled by my email. In addition to checking it first thing in the morning, I would also read my email the last thing before I went to bed. And let’s not forget about the hundreds of times a day, I would also be in my inbox.
But here’s the thing—I wasn’t checking email to check email. I was doing it to control my anxiety.
Once I broke my worry and anxiety, then and only then did the obsessive need I had to constantly check my email go away.
Now, let’s talk about you.
I suspect this isn’t the first time you’ve heard that you shouldn’t be messing around in your inbox first thing in the morning. When you begin your day checking your email, you’re beginning your day in other people’s energy. You’re allowing other people to dictate and control your day versus YOU taking control of your day.
And, what if there’s bad news waiting for you in your inbox? Now you’ve just trashed your day. You’re starting your day on a low note, and now you have to work to bring yourself back up.
If you’ve done any sort of personal development or spiritual development work, you’ve likely heard that checking email first thing in the morning is a bad habit to have.
And, yet … you still do it.
So, here’s my question.
Can you stop?
Would you be able to stop checking email cold turkey tomorrow and replace that morning habit with something more uplifting and healthy?
Try it and see what happens.
And, if you can’t, it’s okay. Don’t beat yourself up.
This is a pretty common problem and you’re definitely not alone.
What I would love to invite you to do is to look beneath the habit. What emotion is driving you to obsessively check your email?
Is it some form of anxiety or worry? Or maybe it’s an emotion you don’t want to feel, such as grief, and you’re using email to distract yourself from feeling it.
Once you know what the emotion is, the next step is to allow yourself to feel those emotions, because once you’ve felt them, they move on. Remember feelings just want to be felt. Once you’ve felt them, they’re done.
I know it can uncomfortable and painful to face those emotions, but it can also be hugely freeing. Breaking myself from my anxiety and worry habit has brought me far more gifts than simply allowing me to not be controlled by my email, not the least of which is having a feeling a deep inner peace most of my waking hours regardless of what’s happening around me.
(And if you’re wondering exactly how you can get everything you want simply by flipping your perspective? Check out the first episode here.)
If you liked this episode, you may also like my “Love-Based Money and Mindset” book.