Has this ever happened to you?
You have a big goal. Maybe you want to start a business or grow a business. Maybe you want to hit a certain income goal. Or maybe you’re finally ready to start writing your book.
So, you start taking action toward that goals.
But … something funny happens.
All these fears start coming up. What if I fail? What if I succeed? What if I spend all of my time working? What if my partner leaves me? What if my kids start to hate me?
Maybe you stop being able to sleep because of all of these worries.
Or, maybe you’re angry all of the time.
Or, maybe you waste hours and hours stewing about how everyone else seems to be further on their journey than you.
So, you find yourself procrastinating or losing focus. Or, maybe you simply can never find the time to work on them.
You’re busy, right? There’s always something more important or urgent to work on.
If any of this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many, many people are unable to take even the smallest action towards their goals and dreams.
They have lots of reasons why. Some of those reasons are even pretty good. They don’t have the time or the money or they’re too old or it’s just not the right time. They can pursue their dreams when the kids go back to school or once their mom isn’t sick anymore or after they retire.
But, here’s the thing. Whatever you telling yourself right now, ISN’T what’s actually stopping you.
I’m not saying that reason isn’t true. I’m saying it’s NOT what’s stopping you.
I don’t care how busy you are, if you’re serious about your dreams, you can find 15 minutes a day to work on them. (And, trust me, you can do a lot in 15 minutes. I wrote 3 books in only 15 minutes day.)
So, if it’s not your excuses, then what’s stopping you?
Simple. Your fear-based emotions.
You see, all emotions fall under either love or fear. Fear-based emotions include fear, anxiety, anger, resentment, guilt, shame, grief.
For most of us, we don’t want to feel our fear-based emotions (for obvious reasons). But, just because we don’t want to feel them doesn’t mean they don’t want to be felt.
It also doesn’t mean they won’t keep chasing you until you actually take the time you feel them.
But, there’s good news. Once you feel them, they move on.
(Yes, it really can be that simple. No, it’s not easy to feel your fear-based emotions, but it IS simple. All it requires is you pause, breathe and feel. Not react. Not DO anything about those emotions. Just be with them.)
So, if you see yourself here, I’d love to encourage you to try something different. The next time you’re taking action on your goals and some fear-based emotion starts to raise its ugly head (whether it be worry or resentment or anger or grief or shame or guilt or something else) rather than DO something about that emotion (including make up a story around why its happening) just STOP.
Stop, breathe and feel.
Then, once it’s moved through you, go back to working on your goals.
You may be amazed at the magic you create in your life or business.
(And if you’re wondering exactly how you can get everything you want simply by flipping your perspective? Check out the first episode here.)
If you liked this episode, you may also like my “Love-Based Goals” book — you can check it out here.
Anastasia Netri says
Love this! So true. I would also add it can help to have someone hold you in those moments, but yes, there’s no way around it. Great stuff Michelle 🙂
Michele PW says
Yes! Absolutely it helps having someone else hold the space for you and is able to hold the space for your emotions (it’s not always easy to find someone like that but I know it’s something you specialize in).